Day 11 – The Very Dreaded Day

It’s that day again… A day that changed my life forever…. A day that has made me dread the month of January…… A day that makes me so restless…. A day no matter how hard I try makes me want shut myself in a room and not come out…. A day when it seems, my mind has a rewind button and plays in a loop the scenes of the dreaded day from 5 years back …. A day when I struggle to even talk to my mum…. A day when all my unanswered questions seem to haunt me…. A day I still try to figure what we could have done to give it a different ending…. A day when I still feel the rawness of the pain… A day I still dwell in ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’….. A day when peoples happiness bothers me…. A day when smiling makes me feel guilty…..

Till yesterday, I had hopes of doing a positive post today but once again the mind has opened all the things that are generally bottled up. It’s like living that nightmare all over again. I hope it will get better with time but till then I have to deal with it.

Just like every year, I hope you are happy and at peace wherever you are. I hope you can see us and feel proud of all our achievements. I hope you continue to watch over us. I hope you still feel our love and know that we miss you. Miss you a lot Baba.

P.S : Please excuse any mistakes, this is one post I don’t wish to edit and check.

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8 thoughts on “Day 11 – The Very Dreaded Day

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