Tuesday Thoughts – Day 68

Studies have always been very important to me. Not that I always loved to study but getting good grades were always important. I was always amongst the top of the class and while I was not the competitive kind but I knew where I stood and always wanted to stay there. My mum often got irritated why I didn’t bother to work harder to be ‘the topper’ but I was content where I was. 

So it was very natural for me to make sure Daughter has a designated study time from early on. I think we started to sit with books and scribble and read while she sat patiently around the time she was 3.5 years. This was a time when she was going to daycare for about 4 hours. She had enough playtime and park time in the evenings. I really saw no harm in sitting for 20 minutes every other day. From early on she knew just like we have fun and play, we also need to sit and study. 

Now Daughter was a very early reader and as much as I would like to take credit for it, I honestly didn’t do much. It was a ritual for me to read to her ever since she was a few days old. And we read lots of books. So by the time she was 2.5, she would even want me to read labels- toothpaste, face wash, body wash, etc. These were particularly her favorites because she would sit on the potty and have me read away to glory. Then there were times of grocery shopping and she would sit in the cart and read food labels, etc. I know there are a lot of our friends who thought I taught her how to read but I can honestly tell you she taught herself reading. Not because it made us happy but because she loves to read. 

Anyway this post is not about her reading. She is in 2nd Grade and makes very good grades. Her teacher challenges her all the time in reading, comprehension and maths. She’s also in the gifted program. I’ve always heard raving reviews from all her teachers. Now we’ve never put her in the kumon classes or other such programs inspite of being pushed by numerous friends. I honestly never felt the need. 

But even at 8 my Daughter is very aware that I’m pretty serious about her work. I absolutely lose it when I see sloppy work. I’m ok if she makes mistakes but do not like to see carelessness. I don’t hesitate to praise and I’m very generous in giving compliments but I don’t mince my words during criticisms either. And there are times I find I’m harsh. 

I often see parents who are chilled about studies and feel so bad about the tight ship that I run. But in my defense all I can say is I strongly believe that you need good grades if you want to do good in life. By good I mean professionally and financially. While I know these elementary level grades aren’t important, I just want to instill the perseverance and hard work in her. I have seen numerous examples of kids who did excellent in school and some how withered away during college. While there are those who were average and are doing exceptionally well now. So you just need to work hard and there isn’t a substitute to working hard. It’s important in every aspect of life. And that’s the only lesson I really want her to learn.

Today I was talking to a friend and that’s how this whole thing came about. Am I becoming one of those obnoxious moms that I hated during school ?? Do I need to listen when she says no to doing extra homework ?? But then again to my defense I want to say she has no homework days too !! Do I need to stop nagging ?? How do all of you deal with the education scenario??  Am I the only one who has these kind of questions ??!!

Blogathon 2017#Day24


11 thoughts on “Tuesday Thoughts – Day 68

  1. I am a confused parent, MTW. On some days, I get a little rattled by peer pressure and I push them. On some days, I tell myself it’s okay and that they are just small kids. Like I wrote in one of my posts, after moving in to Jersey, I am kind of chilled out and I don’t even know why. So, if you are looking for answers to your questions, I don’t have any. I just felt like I could’ve written this post for most part and wanted to just say hugs girl!

  2. MTW, can relate to this as I feel exactly the same about academics..I expect them to be taken very seriously . Both the husband and I were high achievers through school , college and I feel I am already a little hard on Bandar . I am scared I am going to become one of those moms too. But I don’t know how else to be really. I cannot be indifferent .

    1. Thank you for saying this … I can so relate to it … both my hubby and I can’t take a backseat when it comes to academics … while he’s a little easy as of now but I can’t be chilled… and with so much being said that academics not being everything I feel like I’m stuck at a different era because I cannot seem to agree to it …

  3. I used to push Adi too to some extent few years ago as I felt she is capable of it. My main motive was same as you. I will be fine if she is wrong or doesn’t understand but I can’t stand laziness. Absolutely can’t that too from a growing kid. We review all answer sheets and go over the wrong answers. It gets on to my nerve every time I see silly mistake especially with Math. She is very good with academics by nature so I feel relieved as I don’t have to worry about the guilt but I guess I will pay for it in double with the boy. I know it’s too early too judge but it’s getting very difficult to make him sit. I am dreading get those evening sessions.

    1. Yes exactly my point … when I know she’s capable I think I need to push her a little harder so she doesn’t get bored … I can’t tolerate silly mistakes either and get really mad when I hear ‘it’s just a silly mistake’!!

  4. M is tough with grades. Adi used to make fun as if she scores 99 his instant question will be where did you miss that 1. I usually don’t get involved in that type of conversation. What is more important for me is the discipline. Not to default any work. She has become a pro with it now. She has never never defaulted any work and prefers to stay back home to finish up her work while we go out for shopping. I guess that discipline helps in a great way to set all other things right.

  5. With LHB I can’t wait for him to get on his own feet. But I do understand that I have to groom him in the right way to enjoy the benefits at later years like how I am enjoying with Adi now. Extremely sorry for these long comments. I was saving this post to comment when I have some time as I had a lot to say..

    1. Yes the initial years are very important… these are really the formative years and that’s when we as parents need to work hard with them … I’m sure you’ll do wonderful with him too !!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s