Category Archives: daughter

Mish Mash # 2

Summer holidays are in full swing here. I can’t believe I’m a mom of a super independent 3rd grader. Now I’ve always been one of those mums who was never in a hurry to fast forward the toddler years or the whiney phases. I always held those precious days to my heart. I lived in the moment and enjoyed every stage, pleasant or not. And if I’m honest, for most part it was a pretty smooth ride. Now that I see her growing up and becoming increasingly independent, I get emotional. While my heart swells with pride sometimes but then there are times I wish she was still my baby. But that’s a post for a different time :).

Already we are in the 3rd week of summer vacation and we are busy doing fun things while trying not to ignore our basic routine. The routine that I hold on to for dear life. The routine that keeps me sane. Daughter has planned her day pretty well. She has very wisely decided to do her daily studies in the morning straight after breakfast which is often followed by piano practice. Once those two are done, she has the whole day to play, bike, visit neighborhood friends and last but definitely not the least reading. She is still allowed to watch tv only on the weekends. So far things have things have been pretty smooth. Fingers crossed 🤞!! Unlike some kids I hear of, Daughter pretty much entertains herself with pretend play and books for most of her time. 

Friday we also leave for our week long vacation to the beach. So lots of fun coming our way. It’s going to be a much needed break for the hubby and me. Of course our friends from Indiana are also joining us. And what better way to unwind than to sip margaritas at the beach while the kids makes sandcastles and chase the waves. Can’t wait for the fun in the sun to begin !!

As I type I’m sitting outside her piano class and can’t believe how much she has progressed since she started about 2 months back. And the best part is she enjoys playing the piano and performing for us. I must say the decision to learn piano was more me than anyone else. Daughter is generally game to explore new stuff and try different things. But I told her this was something I really wanted her to learn. It’s something I always wanted but never quite got around doing it. And I’m so glad I ‘imposed’ this on her because she seems to be quite a natural. 

Yeah once again I’m here with a mish mash of jumbled stuff. That’s exactly what happens when you’re gone for a bit. There are so many things I want to document that deserves a full post but I never quite get doing them. Every time I sit to write, somehow I get carried away with the current thoughts of daily life and those that are crying for attention gets pushed back for another day. So that’s it for today !! Talk to you soon !! 

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Mish Mash 

In a blink, April swept by me and I’m still trying to catch my breath. Not too much has been going on in my end and yet I’ve been busy with things here and there. Things called regular life with an active and super busy 8 year old. So before I had a chance to pen anything, we are in May. Wow!! May already and in my head it’s like 2017 has just begun.

We have just over 3 weeks till the end of the school year. I can’t wait for summer break to begin. Daughter is at this wonderful age where she pretty much doesn’t need me other than chauffeuring her around or for food. She’s extremely independent but still isn’t in the ‘tween/teen whatever’ phase yet. It’s wonderful to have conversations with her and I’m often amazed at the responses I get. 

I love hanging out with her be it at home or go out shopping. She’s my absolute bff these days. I love to shop and have those mommy n me day outs with her. These days with activities during weekends, summer is the only time to splurge in those luxuries. So I have a lot planned for summer. Three months of unstructured mommy hood with no running around daily. We aren’t doing any regular camps except for a horse riding one which she absolutely insists on doing. Apart from that one, one week camp, swimming and piano lessons will continue. Musical theater will be done after the year end show for the summer. The best part for me is no packing lunches. 

Her being an avid reader, there are times I don’t realize she’s at home. So that definitely helps both of us from getting in each other’s hair. For her a good chunk of the day is also spent in her room playing some pretend games. And right now her current obsession is Harry Potter and Nancy Drew books. She has read the first four books of the HP series and I’ve promised her that she can start the fifth book once the break begins. So you can be assured the first week is going to be spent in having her nose buried. 

We also have a trip to Myrtle beach planned for the last week of June. So definitely there are fun times in the horizon. With the beach vacation looming large, my weight loss plan has picked up double the speed. I only wish the numbers on the scale were a little more promising. Anyway that’s a topic for another day. For today I’m optimistic I’ll get there even if it takes time.

This seems to be a mish mash post of sorts but that’s exactly how my headspace is right now. Too many things screaming for attention. I think I need to do separate posts for a few that I want to talk about in detail but for today I just need to publish this before I re read and delete. So here’s a mish mash peek of my mind :). 

Daughter and her laundry 

Laundry is one of my most dreaded chore. Well I hate most chores but laundry definitely steals the first spot. Especially when the laundry basket sits full in the corner, there are times I can swear it mocks me and dares me to tackle it. But during moments of sheer laziness, I smile and ignore it. And during these very rare times it gets full and more full – kind of like full, fuller and fullest. I guess you get the drift that I did a load of laundry where the clothes were almost on the verge of overflowing from the washer. Yes, that was the sorry state of affairs today.

But while doing it the one person with whom I kept losing my cool was Daughter Dearest !! She’s lucky she was at school or else ….. you ask me if the laundry basket was filled why is it her fault. Surely I don’t expect my 8 year old to take care of her laundry, do I ?? No, I don’t !!

Putting clothes in the washer which is generally a 2 min job but mind you if you’re lucky to do her clothes it can take up to 10 mins. I kid you not. Every damn piece of clothing is inside out. Every single piece !! Really ??!! Inspite of my repeatedly telling otherwise. Why is it so difficult to remember, I have no clue !! 

If that’s not bad enough, you’ll find every leggings has an underwear inside it. Why can’t she put them in separately. And those little panties that are separated they are somehow rolled up. I don’t know how. Oh how can I forget, the leggings mostly also come with socks tucked in the bottom of the legs. And if that’s not enough the socks are almost always rolled in a ball. 

So by the time all these clothes were sorted and the buttons were pressed to start the machine whizzing I was done. I was ready to take a nap. But my laundry woes irritated me enough to sit and type a rant post dedicated to it. 

Parenting Googly – Day 91

I always thought it’s better to teach my Daughter by example than preach. Of course I have my moments when I go on and on about something which I know she barely listens but nevertheless it doesn’t stop me from giving a looong lecture. But in the end I always try to focus on doing things the right way knowing how closely she pays attention to details. 

She knows I’m trying to loose weight and I make no secret about it. I tell her when I cheat and she knows it when I’m being good. She knows when I’m high with enthusiasm and these days she also understands when I’m struggling. Now you might ask, what I’m trying to achieve by sharing my personal struggle with my 8 year old. To me this was a conscious decision. I deliberately share because I want her to be aware of a healthy lifestyle. Apart from sowing the seeds of regular exercise and healthy eating, I also want her to know it’s fine to have bad days but we need to move on and not give up. My mum thinks Daughter hardly understands all that I’m trying to explain but I differ in my opinion. I know she doesn’t understand the bigger picture that I’m desperately trying to show right now, to her she’s the boss of my schedule. She thinks she’s in charge. It gives her great joy to tell me no tv time if I’ve not exercised, etc. But I’m sure she’ll understand my perseverance very soon. She’ll appreciate hard work when she sees her parents working hard no matter what the cause.

The other thing that I’ve consciously tried to practice is dealing with my stress in a better way. Some time back, I felt I was always on edge and yelling a lot. I lost my patience at the drop of a hat. That’s when I asked myself, what am I teaching her ?? That when you are having a bad day, yell and that’ll solve the problem. If you are stressed then yell and the others should bear it because you are having a bad day. Is that how I want a little child to think. Do I need her to study my expression and first judge whether I’m having a bad day before coming to me for any help/talk. NO !! No screamed all over my head. That’s when I tried working on my patience and letting a lot of baggage go. And it helped me as a person and definitely as a mum. 

I’m known for speaking my mind. God help you if you ever mess with my loved ones. I always stood up for my loved ones. It gave me a lot of happiness when I see her standing up for friends or when she sees something wrong. 

So I was really focusing on doing things that I thought were right so that inadvertently she would be steered in the right direction. Atleast that’s what I was hoping for. I was happy with myself because even though the reason of trying to change was to be a better mum but I was really enjoying a much more lighter, carefree, happy me. So to me it was a win win situation.

Yesterday night when I was tucking her in bed, she was talking to me about a random incident in school. I was getting her clothes ready for the morning and kind of had half an ear to her story. Suddenly I heard something’s that I didn’t like which made me keep the other tasks at hand and totally focus on what she was telling me.

Her story went somewhat to the effect that a classmate was a little mean to her and she chose to ignore it because if she said something back then that would hurt the classmate. I was taken aback. Of course you should be considerate to other people’s feelings but not by being hurt yourself. That’s exactly what I told her. Next what she said will have me thinking for a very long time. She told me with a very serious face, “But mommy that’s what you always do. You never show when you are hurt. You just smile but I know you also feel sad.” I honestly didn’t know how to react. I blinked and gulped but no words came out. This gave her further opportunity to elaborate on the point she was trying to make. I was dumbfounded by her sensitivity. Of course I quickly regained my composure and tried being honest. I admitted that yes I have trouble speaking up for myself but I’m getting better. While she had one example of her witnessing something that was directed towards me and I didn’t say anything, I told her little incidents where I did speak up for myself.

 She’s still little and that made her happy. She understood it’s important to speak up for oneself and that’s not selfish or mean. We should never accept disrespect or bad behavior from others. Atleast for now she got the message.

While one part of me was happy after getting first hand proof that kids do watch and learn but there was a part of me which also made me realize once again, parenting is a tough job. While I congratulated myself that she’s definitely picking up traits that we display but it also made me realize that I’m being watched. Every step of the way. It just made me realize how transparent I’m to my 8 year old and I better watch my ways. 

Study Time – Day 87

Happiness is seeing my 8 year old do her studies without being told to do. We woke up later than usual and finished our breakfast; talked to both our homes. Then I was cleaning the kitchen and Daughter came to me asking to tie her hair. By the time I was done with the kitchen cleaning, I saw her focused with some math problems. That was the best sight. For once I feel all those times of forcing her to sit and study and those times of her thinking I’m being mean is finally worth it. Atlast these things show me that after all the drama a positive habit has taken shape. And Im really thankful for that.

As I type I hear hubby and Daughter trying to work with some algebra problems. Yes in case you are wondering she has figured hubby is the more patient one when dealing with maths and every Sunday they sit for a math session. My job is to take care of the weekly homework and study times. My job is to nag and make sure everything is done. My job is to see she practices the new concepts she works with hubby on Sundays. 

While I know all days won’t be perfect and there will be times I will still need to drag her to the study table, we need to take those as bitter pills and swallow them. We need to put in the hard work now to enjoy the perks later. And I’m sure there will be more days like these as she grows up !!

 

Snow Atlast – Day 84

This year we’ve been blessed with a rather mild winter. And yes while we (the grown ups) didn’t complain but the not-so-little member of our family has been praying for some snow. I think in December we got some snow but with winter soon to say bye-bye the plea for more snow has been making the rounds by most of the neighbors kids. So the call at the unearthly hour informing of snow day was greeted with much applause and cheer. 💃💃

Leaving you guys with pics of the pristine white powder that made everyone so happy today.

Tranquility ❄️❄️

Cold and Quiet ❄️❄️

Out for some adventure ❄️❄️

Not a great day for a picnic ❄️❄️

Happiness and Painting Nails – Day 79

Happiness is seeing the hubby paint Daughter’s nails. I had promised to do her nails but I woke up with a bad neck and upper back ache. It’s kind of restricting my movements. So apart from chauffeuring her to her class, I’ve pretty much been useless. 

So when I was apologizing to Daughter that I have to skip painting her nails today, this dad who never shies away from doing anything for his princess offered to paint her nails. Needless to say he was rewarded with kisses galore and that was enough to make his day. 
I feel so blessed to share this parenting journey with this awesome guy !!

When I yelled – Day 78

On Tuesday, I was having a bad day. Well not exactly a bad day but I was stressed and on the edge. I was going about fine doing my stuff and not reacting to a lot of things in fear of overreacting or loosing it. I kept telling myself to be calm and just get over with the day.

Every thing was under control till I reached the bus stop to pick up Daughter. It was cold and raining pretty bad. I saw Daughter getting off the bus and taking her sweet time to walk while the others were hurrying to their cars. But no, mine was walking without her hoodie up and didn’t seem to be in any hurry. The moment she opened the car door with a big smile, I lost it. I yelled and yelled and yelled. She told me sorry about 10 times in that .2345sec drive back home. Even though my heart and head kept telling me I’m overreacting over nothing but my mouth refused to shut up.

Anyway as I always do after giving her a fruit, is check the homework folder. I opened her backpack and found her folder missing. Now for the record I must mention this child has never forgotten or misplaced anything ever. But instead of asking what happened, I lost it again. She kept telling me that she clearly remembers putting her folder in the backpack but it fell on deaf ears. Once again I started acting like I was possessed. I started yelling. Poor girl started to cry. She was crying buckets of tears and was scared that she lost her homework folder. I showed no mercy. I didn’t hug her, never for once said it’s no big deal. On the contrary I did everything that the books tell you not to.

Few minutes later, I hear a knock on the door. I open to see an unknown face. It seems she’s a mom of a 5th grader. Her 5th grade son goes in the same bus. He played a prank on Daughter and sneakily got the homework folder out thinking it would worry Daughter. His mom hearing that was very mad and looked up our address from the school directory and was here to return the folder. I thanked her. She asked her son to apologize to Daughter and hugged Daughter herself.

Soon they were gone. I remember not being able to look at Daughter for a while. I was ashamed of myself. She was still sobbing, and I felt tears trickling down my cheeks. What I did was unforgivable. In my stress and frustration, I yelled at Daughter for no fault of hers. She didn’t know why I was behaving like I was and in all innocence thought everything was her fault. I hugged her and honestly told her I was having a bad day. But even to my ears they sounded pretty lame.

She has forgotten the incident and every time I apologize she brushes me off. But I know this incident will stay with me for a very long time if not forever. I just hope I’ve learnt my lesson and I never repeat this kind of unforgivable behavior ever again. And no matter what anyone says I know this kind of behavior is unacceptable and it’s not fine. 

While this isn’t a happy post but I’m glad I took the responsibility and owned up to Daughter and the hubby. I’m glad she’s still little and thinks a sorry should take care of everything. As for me I’m really glad that I accepted my mistake and hopefully learnt my lesson.

Cheat Week – Day 72


Yesterday I made this delicious and crusty banana-walnut-bread with all the leftover ripe bananas. I could have made some healthy smoothies too but I chose to ignore the suggestion that my mind was giving me. But to my defense I must note that the bread was made mostly to cheer up Daughter who is always happy to help in baking. And that did cheer her up. And in case you are wondering, yes I did have a slice 😉 .


I must note that this week I’ve been bad. I mean really really bad. I indulged in comfort food and didn’t work out apart from that one day. Since I’ve been bragging here about my good habits, I thought it’s only fair to be honest and accept that I’ve been cheating too. 
But I think, I’ll be on track once again after Daughter gave me the speech:

Daughter: Mommy, did you exercise today??

Me: Ummm no …

Daughter: Did you exercise any of these past few days ?? I don’t think you did, did you ??

Me: You were sick and I was busy and daddy was busy and I was tired and ….

Daughter: Looks like someone’s trying to give excuses !!

Me: No, it’s the truth…

Daughter: It’s alright if you’ve missed this week but you need to get back to it. Don’t throw away, what you’ve been working hard on. Take tomorrow off too but Monday you’ll have to get back to your routine, okay mommy??

Me: I guess … ( that’s all I could say after picking up my jaws from the floor). Of course to nurse my hurt ego I decided to have another slice of bread !!

Blogathon 2017#Day28

Again !! – Day 70

What a month this January is turning out to be !! We aren’t done with the month yet and today was the second trip to the pediatrician’s office. Yes Daughter is sick again !! Poor girl is being hit with one thing after the other. 

Yesterday afternoon her school nurse called and informed me that Daughter wasn’t feeling too good and complained of a sore throat. When I offered to pick her up right away, she told me that Daughter was fine for the time but just wanted me to know that she might be coming down with something. Yes just the news you want to hear after you rambled about happiness

The moment I looked at her face when she got off the bus, I knew things weren’t good. Her eyes were puffy, cheeks red and the moment she saw me burst into tears. I decided to wait and see the evening. The hubby was very busy. He was working on an issue and was up from the night before. So it didn’t make sense to bother him either.

Today morning I decided to just take her because the fever was high. Our walk in clinic is usually open from 8-10 in the mornings and I thought we would get it done quickly. Boy was I mistaken !! It seemed the whole city was there. We ran into four of her school mates and one of our friends. All the kids looked like they were miserable. 

Anyway I’ve been trying to finish this post since afternoon but I keep having to rush to give her sponge bath and showers. The fever is raging at 105 and my little girl sits under the heated blanket. I’m ending it now since I want to read to her. 

Amidst all this what makes me happy is my 8 year old still believes that I have the power to make her feel better. Mommy has a magic touch. If only we moms possessed real magic, no child in this world would be sick. 

Blogathon 2017 #Day26